Holiday Reflections

 

As I look outside and see the sun reflecting off the snow and enjoying the way the house is decorated for Christmas, I can't help but think back to this time last year and all that has happened. It was around this time last year that I really began to realize something was wrong. 

I kept getting lost while driving - being confused as to where I was going or how to get there. I started seeing shadows and shapes out of the corner of my eye that I chalked up to being overtired. Then a tremor began in my right hand - not too bad at first but it seemed to get progressively worse. Again, I chalked it all up to being overtired and stressed. When I began to start falling and couldn't keep my balance, and I could not remember conversations I just had, I finally acknowledged that something was going on. 

When I think back on last Christmas and compare it to this year, both Michele and I are so pleased that I have still been able to actively participate in so many of our traditions. In many ways, I feel more present this year than I have in many years in the past due to the nature of my work and the travel requirements and general busyness that accompanied this time of year. 

I was able to help decorate the outside of the house, albeit with a lot more help than I used to need. We even made my new ramp more festive by stringing some lighted garland along one of the railings! 🤣🤣 

We also were able to still decorate our town's 1799 Meeting House with lights in all the windows and pretty greenery under each on the outside. Michele and I have been doing this for over 20 years and I didn't want to give this up. This year we had three generations involved with Caitlyn and Theo helping out!

I was able to help decorate the inside of the house with garland and putting up the Christmas tree. We bought a new tree this year, and although my precious wife didn't listen to me about the height and we can't put the tree topper angel on, it's beautiful as always. 

Michele and I attended the high school Christmas concert, which is something we've done for many, many years, and will try to attend the Community Christmas concert next week provided the weather and Lewy cooperate. 

One of our traditions that I was sure I was not going to be able to do this year was our holiday letter that I started several years ago to let our friends and family know what's been happening with us and the girls over the past year. While it took me a LOT longer to write and edit it, I was still able to finish it so it could be included with the Christmas cards we send out. I was also able help with that, although I was relegated to stuffing and stamping because my handwriting has become so small and it's hard to read sometimes. 

While these things may seem small, they are all huge victories for us and wonderful memories for Michele and the girls to carry forward. Life was so uncertain (and still is) that being able to continue with our family traditions has been a Christmas gift all of its own.

Everything is just a little different this year, and that has been okay for the most part. I get frustrated when I cannot help with shoveling or walking Pippin, it takes me much longer to do things and I get tired much more easily, and I find myself getting more confused lately. I know Lewy is messing with me when I end up putting toothpaste in my hair instead of hair gel and I have to redo my pills five times because I keep messing them up!😂

While those are hard things, I remain so blessed with a wonderful and supportive family and network of friends. Michele and the girls suggested I include our annual letter in this blog so I agree to attach it at the end. 

I want to wish all of my friends and family and anyone who reads this a very Merry Christmas and a Blessed and Happy New Year! God willing I will be doing this again next year.

Merry Christmas to All!

 

         2023 has been a very chaotic and challenging year for our family. We’ve had many changes – some positive and some not so. Through it all we continue to face things together as a family and know that we are blessed in so many ways. We are all looking forward to 2024 and all the good things we know are coming!

         I completed my 8^th and final year as the Executive Director of the NH School Administrators Association in March, having to medically retire early. Michele continues teaching – this year a straight 5^th grade classroom at Groveton Elementary School. It’s a challenging but fun class, and she is whipping them into shape! She will be retiring at the end of this year, which will be a tremendous loss to the students and the community, but we are both looking forward to her being home. 

         As many of you may know, in March of this year I was diagnosed with Lewy Body Dementia. This is a progressive and ultimately fatal neurological disease that includes a whole host of symptoms, chief among them hallucinations, decreased executive functioning, changes in mood and attention, and Parkinson’s like motor issues (at least for me – not everyone with LBD experiences these). 

The symptoms started appearing almost two years ago, but I chalked most of them up to being tired, stressed, or depressed. When I could no longer navigate around Concord without getting lost and started seeing shapes and shadows out of the corner of my eye, I knew something wasn’t right. In December, I began falling and losing the ability to concentrate on anything. I went to see my neurologist and, after a ton of tests and eliminating everything else, she recommended that we learn as much as we could about LBD and for us to get my affairs in order. That started a chain of events that has certainly changed our lives. We remain strong and I live every day with the knowledge that I am blessed and loved beyond measure. We will face it as it comes.

         The joy of our lives continues to be our family. Our grandson, Theo, will turn 4 in March. He started preschool at the Sunnybrook Montessori in Lancaster and is an active and extremely intelligent little man. He loves his monster trucks and Mickey Mouse – and his Nana! He is such a joy to us, and we are so blessed that we get to see him almost every day. 

         As for our girls—Caitlyn, 34 years old, and her husband Josh live right behind us, so we get to spend a great deal of time with them and Theo. Josh still works at NSA and part-time at Scorpio’s. He’s been such a help to us as we’ve had to rely on him more for things I used to do.  Caitlyn began a new job as the Director of the Lancaster Play & Learn Center. It’s been a challenge but she’s so happy.  They make such a wonderful family. Carrie, 32 years old and our youngest, still works as a Special Education Teacher at Groveton High School.  She completed her Master’s degree (woohoo!) and obtained her teaching license. We are so proud of the adults they have grown into. 

         Our family is healthy, all the kids are gainfully employed and happy, and we have a beautiful grandson who brightens our days, Michele has a job that she loves and a career of which she can be immensely proud – we count our many blessings. We are excited to see what awaits us in 2024!

          We hope all our family and friends have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!